


One Hundred Fifty-One Nights

by GravitasErrant



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Gen, Jemma Simmons Needs a Hug
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-14
Updated: 2019-12-14
Packaged: 2021-02-26 06:00:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,229
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21788656
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GravitasErrant/pseuds/GravitasErrant
Summary: Sometimes, Daisy understood her best friend. She couldn’t finish Jemma’s sentences or give the exact words she needed to feel at home or understand when she needed a cup of tea the way that the love of Simmons’ life could, but Daisy knew grief which is why she lets Jemma speak to a metal ghost of that love. Set during the search for cryo!Fitz
Relationships: Jemma Simmons & Skye | Daisy Johnson, Leo Fitz/Jemma Simmons
Comments: 2
Kudos: 18





	One Hundred Fifty-One Nights

**Author's Note:**

> Just something I wrote in a night when I started thinking about all the leftover tech and what people would do with it if they were doing in stages of grief. In Simmons' case, it's a slightly nicer take on that Black Mirror episode but she actually can see the love of her life again. I also thought that this would help solidify Daisy's conviction and being okay with Fitz (it's edited out but she does have interactions with LMD Fitz while Jemma's working)

_**Night 94** _

**__** _“I miss you.”_

_“It’s okay.”_

_“I just wish you were really here.”_

_“I will be soon. Just keep talking until then, okay Jems?”_

**Night 128**

It wasn’t healthy what Simmons did to keep herself sane at night. Daisy knew this but she didn’t say anything. She knew the last invention Fitz had made was in Simmons’ room and it was both keeping Jemma together and tearing her apart.

Sometimes, Daisy understood her best friend. She couldn’t finish Jemma’s sentences or give the exact words she needed to feel at home or understand when she needed a cup of tea the way that the love of Simmons’ life could, but Daisy knew loneliness and how it felt when nobody understood what it was like to have it perfectly fulfilled in places that they didn’t even know were empty. And then once they did, it was only yanked away without so much as a goodbye.

Daisy tried not to think of hers most days, but it still ached when she heard a little electric shock or saw someone in a suit. Aboard the Zephyr, Daisy even found it difficult to watch something as light as Men in Black on their movie nights.

As Piper and Davis argued and tried to get Jemma’s attention on the engine, their one scientist was looking out the window. Her eyes were glazed over as though she were dreaming as they gazed on the endless expanse of stars. Daisy understood her best friend and her numb stare. 

She was still trying to live with a ghost of her own making.

_**Night 133** _

**__** _Leaning her head against the bunk wall, Daisy heard the whispers again._

_“So Perthshire…”_

_“Mmhm.”_

_“You sure you don’t want Sheffield?”_

_“...I’ve been meaning to ask this. And this may be the only time I’ll get a straight answer that I can fact check but...were you...were you ever attracted to AIDA?”_

_Daisy’s eyes shot open. She wanted to scream at the wall for Jemma to go to sleep.This was not a good way to investigate her fiance’s past._

_“Yes.”_

_Daisy squeezed her eyes tight. Even in this form, Fitz was the worst at this kind of talk._

_Jemma sounded crestfallen. “Oh. I-I thought you…were into a classical beauty.”_

_“I am.”_

_“Then why did you…”_

_“You asked if I was ever attracted. I can’t lie. You made sure of that.”_

_“Right…”_

_“I am attracted to a classical beauty. I am also attracted to a tall blonde beauty. Or a petite Asian one.”_

_“Wha--I think that’s enough.” Why the hell was it even saying all this? Didn’t Simmons reprogram it with more tact?!_

_“I’m attracted in the same way that I find hobnobs delicious and cat livers disgusting. It’s a factual statement that any human can find true. Ask me something that only a human named Leopold Fitz can.”_

_Daisy finally understood the point. She had to revise her last thought. Even as a robot, Fitz was a genius in not just engineering but Jemma Simmons._

_“Do you love me...and only me?”_

**Night 151**

By now, Jemma Simmons should be used to feeling alone now. It wasn’t a skill or state that Daisy had ever thought Jemma would ever have as long as her other half was there, but the universe seemed to be fully aware of this and strived to remind her of this by cruel example.

In this case, aboard the newly rebuilt Zephyr, Daisy couldn’t understand how Simmons often tuned out when their little search team brought up seemingly tiny concerns like food or fuel, especially since their crew was down to just four.

“Simmons, you listening?”

“One of the core battery packs is down.” Piper said urgingly.

“We’re going to have to revise our journey plan and cut off another month and a half if we want to—”

“No.” Jemma said. “I can fix it in the morning.”

“How? We don’t have any other spare—”

“We do.”

“Where?” Piper and Davis exchanged confused glances. The rest of their spare batteries had to go with the crew that had to leave the main Zephyr for their journey home.

Jemma didn’t answer as she tapped at the console, mapping out the Triskanawan ship they were tracking. This was their latest and so far best chance at finding Leopold Fitz. Daisy was behind her friend for this but right now, she felt like she was watching Captain Ahab.

Davis took a moment before speaking. “Okay…and our communications array? We’ll be outside of a communications zone in 6 hours and our power is focused on keeping the engines going.”

Jemma shook her head. “We saw that Trikanawan ship. It’ll be out of range in less than that if we drop speed now. It has traces of Fitz’s ship fuel on it. If we could spare the energy to, we would send a signal.”

Davis hesitated and Daisy knew why. He wanted to send his family a message while he could. They were already five months in and his son’s birthday was coming soon.

“Jemma…maybe we need to fix the array first. Get some word out to base and maybe get some relief crew here. We still have tracers on ships that have the same fu—”

“No. The morning.” Simmons’ tone brooked no argument.

Again, Davis seemed to struggle to say what he really wanted to. “Simmons, we’re still going to need to contact base…”

“We need to leave messages for the people we left behind if we want them to still be there when we get back, Simmons.” Piper had no issues addressing the elephant in the room. For a moment, Daisy thought Jemma was taking a moment to consider a retreat more thoughtfully until Piper had crossed a line. “…didn’t you do the same when you were on Maveth?”

Daisy knew she shouldn’t have told Piper about the messages Jemma recorded on Maveth. When she told her about it, it was to talk about how sweet that Fitzsimmons always had each other on their minds, even in the face of death and adversity. However, this was the wrong time and the wrong place to bring it up. Daisy didn’t mention it, but she also knew those messages were the thing that brought Fitz back to Jemma after finding out about Will.

Even though Daisy knew Fitz wasn’t so petty as to hold it against Simmons falling for someone else, she knew that it stung his insecurities and sense of worth. It never made any sense to Daisy why a genius like Fitz would be so doubtful and insecure about his value until she found out about the source of Fitz’s insecurities in the Framework.

In a way, she was glad to have the father figure she had later in life. In any case, she would gladly join the team with Mack and Jemma to visit Alistair Fitz in real life if it ever came. Those messages might’ve been the one saving grace that let Fitz have the smallest bit of hope where he could slowly believe Jemma when she said she loved him.

Jemma’s eyes hardened as she glared daggers at Piper. “We’ll continue talking at 0700. I’ll fix the battery by then.”

She promptly left the helm without another word. Her ponytail swayed behind her as she strode away from them.

“Jeez, I know she wants to find Fitz. We all do but…this is…”

Daisy nodded. “I know. I’ll talk to her and see what we can do. Davis, feel free to record a message to send to your wife and son. Same goes for you and your girlfriend, Piper.”

“Thanks, Daisy.”

“…Thanks. But we’re more casual. She’s not really my girlf—”

Daisy rolled her eyes. “When did you two first meet?”

“A year, year and a half ago.”

“Did you two see anyone else before you left?”

“No?”

“Has long has it been since you left?”

“Five months.”

“Has she seen anyone else since you’ve been in space?”

“No? What are you getting at?”

“I’m saying you might’ve found your Fitz. Don’t wait another month in space to not admit it. Don’t be a Simmons. Just admit it.”

Piper frowned and headed to her bunk, ignoring Davis’ smug smirk. Davis blew a sigh and scratched his head, messing up his finely combed hair. “I’m still worried. I know Simmons is obsessed and driven but lately she’s been kind of ruthless. After the last couple aliens she interrogated and threatened, I’d even say heartless.”

Daisy couldn’t help a small laugh. Heartless was not a word she would use for Simmons even though plenty of their old crew would happily use it. For what Jemma was going through, it was something incredibly close to it while Fitz was still out there. It was how Daisy would’ve described Fitz when he was searching for clues on the monolith those years back.

“You sure she’ll be…”

“Back in an hour.”

“How do you know?”

“I know that look in her eyes. She’ll go to her safe space and be back in exactly that time.”

“…She still has…?”

“Yeah. She used to leave it alone for a while…but after the third month…”

Davis opened his mouth and then closed it. Daisy figured that he had come to the same conclusion that she had when they first noticed Simmons doing her nightly routine more and more on the Zephyr. Everyone on this ship needed something to remind themselves of what their home was. To Davis, it was a picture of his newly born son in his wife’s arms and a recording of his wife singing to the little Davis to sleep. Piper kept a medal of honor from her slightly estranged father and a book from her not-girlfriend.

Daisy nodded him a good night and walked down the bunks. Hers was next to Jemma’s which was why she knew more details about Simmons’ reminder of home.

As for Daisy, she was tempted to keep the same type of reminder that Simmons was but decided she wasn’t strong enough to ever let it go nor did she have the real thing waiting for her once it was found in deep space.

She paused just outside Jemma’s door when she heard it. A soft, Scottish voice.

“Jemma…”

“Yes, Fitz?”

“You’re going to have to do it.”

Daisy bit her lip. It still felt wrong hearing his voice coming from that thing. However, it seemed to keep Jemma from losing it. Most nights, she’d just talk to it like it was a normal night at the Playground before Aida or the Kree. They had the same routine back in the Lighthouse as they pretended that the end of the world wasn’t coming.

“I know but…it feels like I’m killing you again. I know it’s not…”

“You already did. You never stitched up that scalpel wound, ya know. You kept it to remind yourself…”

A long shuddering intake of breath. “Okay, I’ll take out the battery. Just…one last time before…”

It spoke with the same understanding and care as the real thing. “It won’t be the last time.”

“You promise?” She sounded so vulnerable and small then. Daisy wanted to open the door and hug her friend.

“I can’t promise anything. He did. But I can repeat it to you. One last time. And when you do see him, it’ll be better because it really will be me. Not just a memory.”

“Okay.”

Daisy felt like she shouldn’t hear this. She had heard it repeated for so many nights and it felt wrong every time. The only time it would’ve felt right was when they weren’t in such a massive mess. For where they would hear it in whatever passed for normal in SHIELD. Fitz would likely put together a romantic night for Jemma. The group would leave them alone to await the inevitable news and then celebrate.

She shouldn’t hear this.

“I’ve missed you so much and I was wrong and I am so happy that I am wrong…The universe can’t stop us. Because we have been together even we weren’t, crossed galaxies, we survived the bottom of the Atlantic just so we could be together. And a love like that, that is stronger than any curse. You and I, we are unstoppable together.” Daisy blinked, feeling something prickling at the corners of her eyes. “I don’t want to live another day without you.”

Jemma’s voice was husky and barely above a whisper. “I can’t lose you again. I’m not strong enough to live in a world without you…”

“Jemma Simmons, will you marry me?”

“Yes. Always.”

There was a long pause before Daisy heard a soft buss on a cheek and a faint power whine down as the LMD shut off.

By 0630, the communications array was live. A new battery had been replaced into the ship. Daisy only offered a small smile at Simmons as they went back to work in searching for the Triskanawan ship. Davis and Piper got the message just fine after the next few nights when they stopped hearing a Scottish voice.

It was because of moments like this that Daisy disagreed with Davis or any of their old crew that left. Jemma wasn’t heartless in the least bit.

Jemma Simmons had a heart. She just had to find him again.

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you enjoyed and didn't get too bummed out. If you did, sorry. If you're looking for more, I still have the version where Daisy kept her LMD of Coulson. I really feel like Daisy was a bit shorted on the loss of Coulson, her one decent father figure that had no crazy emotional strings attached.


End file.
